Do Do Bird

There are no soccer matches tonight.

Highly irritated. This is one of the symptons of cold turkey. Am relying on strong doses of chocolate to stay alive and human. It is strange how the female species can throng Orchard Road for retail bargains. Madness, when they could have been lounging at home in state of zen.

Since I am free, I shall blog on one memorable experience that happened during the World Cup. It is the sort where if I am ever confronted with it in real life, I shall act confused and shake head profusely. So friends, you have been warned.

The silliest thing I did during this World Cup happened during one night at 3 am. Usually, all I need to do is turn on the tv because the soccer channel is normally the one last tuned in to.

Unfortunately, this time my dad was feeling intelligent and decided to watch the news on Channelnewsasia prior going to bed. No sweat, the brilliant me could always switch things back to the channel where the REAL action was.

Yes, soccer action at last. Jeez, Starhub's new soccer coverage isnt too bad. This must be the helicopter vision that my staff appraisal report talks about. The kind where bosses are said to have and which I dont.

After 15 mins, you start to think that Starhub is taking things too far. There is only so much entertainment in watching 22 stick figures running around the pitch. Hey, even the World Cup soccer game in Xbox is tonnes more interesting. You sulk because you cannot view the corner and free kicks properly. In fact, you cannot even see the soccer ball at all!

After another 5 mins of this, you have had enough. You reach for the phone and dial the 24 hr customer service. Mentally, you are rehearsing what you intend to say. All of them along the lines of if Starhub thinks they can get away with this new age helicopter vision screening of matches, they can jolly well think again, scoundels and unacceptable.

While waiting for the line to go through, you decide to check out the other soccer channel and see if things are the same at the other end. Who knows, maybe someone was trying to cut cost and reduce the number of cameras on the pitch just because there were 2 matches going on at the same time. The boys' scout's motto is to be prepared, or something along those lines. Much better to rant about 2 channels than 1. Make you sound like you have done your checks.

Then your mouth drops. The coverage on Channel 22 is perfectly normal. You realise that something could be wrong. Wisely, you click the call disconnect button on the phone. Then you flip to Channel 27 and see all things are fine. You frown a little and change channels to 28. Once again, there is the familiar helicopter coverage.

Enlightenment dawns.